Aikido!

The jury was still out after my last Aikido class. I wasn’t sure I liked it. I felt awkward, exposed, and inept, but I went back because I recognized that I might just be feeling that way because it was my first class.

After tonight’s class, the jury has returned a verdict: I’m pretty sure I love Aikido.

Or at least I loved it tonight.

The class was smaller, just Sensei, three other students, and me. I was the only woman there. One of my classmates was about my dad’s age, I think, and wore grey belted slacks, a short-sleeved green polo shirt and wire-rimmed glasses. He was a more experienced student than the rest of us. I think the other two guys might be high school students. The one had a mop of sandy brown hair combed forward to frame a round face with a touch of acne. He wore a My Bloody Valentine t-shirt, a bracelet that I’m pretty sure read “I ♥ BOOBS!”, and what appeared to be plaid flannel pajama pants. The other young man was slender and had short, dark brown curly hair and kind of a wired nervous energy. He wore jeans, an orange t-shirt, and white athletic socks.

The switching between partners for practice felt seamless today, and I really got the feeling that we were all honestly trying to help one another. At the end of class, we shake each person’s hand, give a little hug, and say thank you. This process was much less awkward than it was on the first day.

The other awesome thing: we learned and practiced on one another a move in which we take the other person’s arm, one hand on their wrist and the other at their elbow, and walk forward until they’re lying on the floor and we’re kneeling beside them. Instead of feeling frustrated that I wasn’t getting all of the steps right, I felt energized and eager to try again when I made a mistake. When I got it right, it just felt so effortless. Just put this guy’s wrist by my knee, bend his elbow back, and there he is on the floor. Once my partner emitted a soft “ugh!” as I took him down. I surprised myself by having mixed feelings about this. I don’t want to hurt the poor guy who’s trying to help me learn these moves, but it’s somewhat gratifying to have that kind of power. (It was liking the sense of power that surprised me.)

I love watching Sensei demonstrate. He’s so calm, with a small smile on his face as he just makes these tiny moves and brings one of us to the floor. I find it fascinating to watch. My feeling about being the person he’s demonstrating on is more nuanced. He doesn’t hurt me, really, but there’s that edge of fear that I feel (and that I see on the faces of my classmates when he demonstrates on them) that comes from the knowledge that he’s just giving us a tiny little bit of what he can do. He’s this smallish older guy from Thailand, probably around my dad’s age, too, but he’s like a lounging cat, relaxed but ready to react at a moment’s notice. And like a cat, he seems designed entirely for his task. It’s a little unsettling but almost hypnotic at the same time.

I think that what I liked was a combination of a good physical workout, a sense of accomplishment and incremental improvement, and an idea of cooler things to come combined with connection with other people.

It was a good time.

So, I definitely see the appeal of Aikido now. And I’m definitely looking forward to next week’s class.