Savory Smoothies: Sapping the Joy from My Morning

With all of our recent travels and visitors, s’mores and dark chocolate honey mints, martinis and more martinis, my body has been thrown entirely off-kilter and is telling me so with all kinds of interesting and very uncomfortable symptoms, which I will not describe because I like you and because this isn’t that kind of blog.

My solution involves lots of probiotics and a return to normal eating—which my husband already thinks is fairly extreme, given the amount of leafy greens I consume—via a more extreme no-sugar, no-alcohol, no-grains, no-fruit kind of plan until things feel normal again. Basically, I’m giving up all of the things that make life worth living. But I added chicken back into my diet for the moment, so at least I have that.

I thought it would only be a few days before I felt back in balance again, but it’s taking a little longer than that. As a result, I’ve done something I’ve been avoiding for years: I’ve begun researching savory smoothies.

By savory smoothies I mean smoothies without fruit. Kind of like cold, blended vegetable soup. Which is just why I’ve avoided them for so long.

Before I could change my mind, I found seven savory smoothie recipes online and I went shopping.

Today’s has kale, tomato juice, half of a fresh hot pepper, a cucumber, curry powder, scallions, celery, and ice.

Mmm…

Don’t worry: It looks better than it tastes. Actually, the flavor’s not too bad; the texture is the real challenge. A straw helps.

My three-year-old son, adventurous chap that he is, took a sip. He gagged and said, “There’s lettuce in my mouse!” (which, because he can’t pronounce a TH sound, translates to, “There’s lettuce in my mouth!”). Of course, there’s no lettuce in the smoothie, but I didn’t bother to correct him. I just got him a glass of water and a bowl of raisins.

I’ve got six days of recipes remaining, and I’m going to stick with it until I get through them all. By the end of the week, I may or may not feel back in balance physically, but I’m pretty sure that I will no longer fear death.

Related articles (but this is NOT the recipe I tried this morning)

6 Replies to “Savory Smoothies: Sapping the Joy from My Morning”

  1. I can’t help but be amused at the contrast between how I perceive the savory smoothie and you you think of it. I tried the fruit smoothie and said yuck, too sweet, I want a savory non fruit smoothie. So I’ve been googling for new ideas for savory smoothies to quench my craving for them. You on the other hand see them as punishment. Perhaps because I’m not restricting fruit makes the difference? I hope they made you feel better anyhow. 🙂

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    1. I learned to love savory smoothies after I found a few recipes that really hit the spot for me. There are links to those on my post “50 Shades of Green,” but they’re all on Tess Masters’s Healthy Blender Recipes blog. The only thing that I would love to find is a savory smoothie I like that doesn’t call for avocado. I love avocado, but we can’t always get good ones where I live.

      Thanks for your comment, Sarah!

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  2. good luck!! keeping them extra cold helps, too. and plenty of water in the mix, if it’s too chunky 🙂 thanks for the mention! happy blending!

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    1. I remember how much I disliked green smoothies when I first tried them, so I’m not willing to give up yet! Thanks for the tips. I think more water would be a great modification.

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