Always Learning

My children teach me things every day. One of the biggest things they teach me is about the flexibility of language.

Like, if they say, “Don’t say anything, Mommy,” they mean, “I’m going to do something you don’t approve of. I already know you don’t approve of it, so you can save us both the trouble by not saying anything.”

Or if they say, “Mommy, I don’t need a haircut,” that means, “I’ve figured out how to use common household objects to create a makeshift ladder so I can reach the scissors. And you get to play hide-and-seek with the hair!”

An ancillary to the haircut lesson: “The kitty’s hair looks great, Mommy!”

This morning I learned that when my three-year-old turns off the blender that’s whirring my morning smoothie about and says, “My butt’s making funny noises, Mommy,” he means, “Before breakfast, you get to do a load of laundry, clean the bathroom, and give me a bath. And as a little something special for you, you also get to wash your hair!”

(But I can play that game, too: when I say, “Hold on a sec, kids, I just need to check something,” it means, “I’m going to publish a blog post about you.”)

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